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Hillbilly Diet Planner - Down to the Good Earth
Before we jet off on our Hillbilly Diet Planner, let's address just a few Weight Contributors. The link to the diet planner is at the bottom of this article:
Younguns
Having younguns will really put a cork on the old diet. If yore female, 9 months of toting about does a body in. If yore male, listening to yore woman moan about being child-ladened is enough to do a body in.
Then after the little varmints are born, they’s real picky little eaters. Pizza this, soda pop that, hamburger this, chocolate that. They like finger foods and truth is, eating fastfood is generally cheaper and we know it’s quicker. Trouble is – we end up at the fastfood joints with ‘em and who can resist happy meals? Let’s not forget eardrums.
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Baby-bawling is enough to make a grown person cry their own self! Talk about stress! As the years roll by, the pounds roll on.
Hooch
A little shine every now and then isn’t going to amount to a hill of beans. But too many happy spirits can make yore gut look like you’ve swallowed the dang keg! Kick-a-poo-joy juice is something that’s best handled a little at a time.
Stress
Stress lives in the big city. Has a fancy name to it, too. It’s called CIVILIZATION. From time-to-time, it does a body good to escape into the Wild Blue Yonder. And if you do, be sure and pack yore umbrella cuz you’ll need it just as sure as the sun rises.
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Holidays & Happy Events
Yep, even the happiest of moments in life can be damaging. We git to partying and before we know whut hit us, we’ve done happied far too much. Some events to watch out for include: Weddin’s, Christmas, Thanksgiving & rich Uncle Lester’s funeral – which I must say, was equalivent to Thanksgiving.
Even sporty occasions will blow up a body. My butt gained 8 inches in width just by watch’ my lil’ Johnny play softball one year. Sittin’ on those bleachers, jetting in buttered popcorn, soda, ice cream and nachos really grand slammed me for a loop.
Money
Money ne’ver done much good for anyone or anything in this life cept purchasing new teeth to eat with. Seems like every time that I get my hands on a wad of ones that I either blow it all on the local bakery shop or find myself in need at the outhouse without a leaf in site.
So money causes stress and stress causes us to sometimes eat more than we need to. So if you have money, send it all to me and this problem will be solved.
City Duds/Country Duds
Believe it or not, duds are the reason that many folks are overweight. Once you spend a certain amount of money on new-fangled duds it just doesn’t make sense to lose weight so you’ll have to buy more.
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Too Much Sweet Chaws & Butter Rues
Sweets and fats are probably the most understood items in our diet. Truth is, sweets won’t hurt a fellow not a lick if eaten smartly. I don’t think that I’d want to hear another rooster crow Good Mornin’ if I knew that I could never enjoy another slice of homemade buttered bread, would you?
Navigate the Hillbilly Diet Plan
*This content is for informational & reading purposes only.
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